Does anyone even want my baby?
by Katie McGee
Adoptive Family Counselor
I have learned countless lessons and loads of information since my first day as an employee at Covenant Care. One of the most surprising things I’ve learned is how often the pregnant women we serve ask, “Is there anyone who wants to adopt my baby?” As both a counselor who serves couples hoping to adopt and as an adoptive parent myself, this question always shocks me. If you are one of those women asking that question, may I speak to you for a moment?
I am sorry that you have found yourself in a situation that is no doubt scary and confusing and painful. Choosing adoption for your child can be a lonely road and our heart as a ministry is that you would feel supported and encouraged by all of us. I also want you to know that Y-E-S there are couples who want to adopt your baby! In fact, there are multiple families and you get to choose the one that you feel matches up with what you desire for your child.
Some of these families have walked through the grief of losing a child. Others cannot have children biologically. Some couples already have children and want to continue growing their family through adoption. Regardless of the circumstances these couples bring to us, you can offer something amazing to both your child and the adoptive couple you choose. You can allow them to experience life together as a family! Adoption can take the difficult circumstances you find yourself in and turn them into something beautiful for everyone involved.
These couples have been trained and vetted by the standards of the state of Georgia and our agency to ensure that they can provide for a child financially, emotionally, and spiritually. We believe that our couples are some of the best! Not only do these couples want to add a baby to their family, they want to love and honor you as well. Their heart to adopt through Covenant Care is to be an option for you, not just for your baby.
We believe that it is vital that adopted children know their own stories, and we love to see situations where birth families and adoptive families meet and develop a relationship built on trust and mutual respect. You can receive letters and pictures from the adoptive family and have the option to have visits with them after they adopt your child. This whole adoption thing is so much bigger than any one piece of this puzzle. It is about the sum of all of the parts—the child, the family, and the birthmother. At Covenant Care, we want everyone to be well-cared for and loved!
When I was a prospective adoptive parent sitting in a training with Covenant Care in 2010, those leading the training talked about the topic of meeting and interacting with a child’s birthparents. I remember literally elbowing my husband and saying, “I hope we never have to do that.” It just seemed so awkward and uncomfortable! I’ve never been so glad that I didn’t get what I originally thought I wanted!
Just a few months later, I found myself sitting across the table from the most beautiful pregnant woman I’d ever seen. I could not stop staring at her. I couldn’t escape the feeling that I was living one of the most sacred moments of my life. I was scared and there were definitely some awkward moments. However, meeting my daughter’s birthmother is an experience I will treasure for the rest of my life.
I could sense the Lord doing something miraculous that day. He bonded us together in a way that only he can do. I loved her the moment I saw her and I am forever grateful that we had the opportunity to meet. Those memories are some of my favorite to share with my daughter—they are part of her story and show just how loved and wanted she is. That is a gift!
I write all of this as someone who has experienced first-hand the gift of meeting our daughter’s birthmom and as someone who knows very well the families waiting to adopt through Covenant Care. These couples are hoping and praying for the opportunity to experience that gift, too.
If you are considering adoption and are wondering if there really are families who would want your baby, talk to your Birthmother Counselor about your options. You may be surprised to find how many people are waiting to accept and love not only your baby, but also to accept and love you.
We are praying for you and cheering you on as you face some difficult circumstances! In Covenant Care you will find a genuine community of love and support. You are not alone!
Katie earned her Bachelor of Science degree in Family Ministry from Toccoa Falls College. She walks adoptive families through the adoption approval process, from home study to pre-placement counseling and placement. She is married to Luke, and together they are the parents of two children adopted through Covenant Care.